After the original 5 e-dating disasters, and the infamous "scrot guy" you'd think that I was completely put off of e-dating and maybe even men in general, but no, there was one last would be suitor who presented himself before I removed myself permanently from the e-dating circuit.
I met with the man that we'll call the entrepreneur for dinner after slightly bruising my ego on someone else who I also met through electronic means. In town frequently on business, the entrepreneur was looking for someone to spend time with during the evenings and not really looking for or interested in a long term or serious relationship that would "go somewhere" like pretty much everyone else in Fargo seems to be.
Although I knew it could be dangerous having drinks in or near his hotel, I decided that under no circumstances was I going anywhere near his room so it would be alright to meet there. When he arrived he was fairly good looking, not exceedingly tall, personable, had incredibly curvy biceps peaking out of his short sleeved button up shirt and curly black hair.
I'm a little embarrassed that my first drink made me light headed, but I responsibly ordered pasta to soak up the martini and very casually nursed a beer over the course of dinner while he drank three in rather rapid succession. Dating is a nerve-racking activity so I can understand the need to take the edge off, but he had another reason to be nervous... that's right, he's married.
Now this wasn't some revelation that came up over forkfuls of alfredo, I knew that he was married before I walked into the hotel. He told me very early on in our communications that he has a wife and that he understood if I no longer wanted to meet with him. Having been the victim of OWS (other woman syndrome) myself, the situation piqued my curiosity. Maybe I would be able to in some way tap in to that mentality and understand a little more about how my own marriage unravelled. So when I agreed to meet with him after vigorous debate with myself, I agreed on the basis that it would be platonic. Who knows, maybe he just needed someone to talk to or convince him that it was an all around bad idea to involve a third party in the break up of a marriage. (Yes, I am actually that delusional and optimistic.)
Of course, he asks if I would like to come up and watch a movie, and naturally, he asks out of sheer concern for my well-being if I've had too much to drive, and insists that if I came up nothing would happen. And then after walking me to my car phones me to make sure I got home safely when I had just texted to tell him I had and thanked me for meeting him. And emailed me the next day saying that he really couldn't drink if we went out again because he was having trouble keeping his mind in platonic mode.
All in all, I'm glad that I went, it was insightful and I didn't know what I was going to get out of it and I still don't know what I actually did get out of it save this: maybe marriage is an outdated idea that takes otherwise happy people and makes them feel trapped and when any animal, human or otherwise feels trapped, they all revert to some primitive instinct that makes them claw like hell at the ties that bind.
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